Just finished reading a book ‘The Shining Girls’ by Lauren Beukes. It’s a time traveling thriller and I really enjoyed it.
There was one passage though that reminded me of times gone by:-
The shop windows are baffling. The prices absurd. He wanders into a covenience store and retreats again, disturbed by the white aisles and flourescent lights and the glut of food in cans and boxes with colour photographs that scream the contents. It makes him feel nauseous.
The writer was talking about the experience of time jumping from the 1930’s to the 1990’s.
Can you just imagine the shock!
It then reminded me of the time I collapsed in a supermarket from adrenal fatigue………
I was getting more and more tired and as the days went on it was harder to cope with every day life. At dancing I had to wear ear plugs, when I tried to dance I kept falling over. If I managed more than 2 dances a night I was exhausted and as for driving home – the headlights coming towards me dazzled me and my eyes were so leaden I could hardly keep them open. It was a wonder I got home safely at all, my reactions had slowed right down and if I saw a bend ahead of me I struggled to co-ordinate my brain and actions.
When the supermarket incident happened I had already been off work for a few months and yet with not being in work I had not realised how much lower I had gone. I’d had a few days rest with nothing but peace and quiet, no radio, no tv, no one to talk to just absolute peace. Then my partner came and realised I needed some shopping doing, so hiding behind the mask of ‘I’m OK today‘ I went with him. Using my walking stick, his arm supporting me we took the short walk. Out of breath after 10 steps, I still insisted on going on and on and on. That’s how the short walk seemed to me.
‘disturbed by the white aisles and flourescent lights and the glut of food in cans and boxes with colour photographs’
Your body deals with stress because your adrenal glands react to what your eyes see, what your ears hear and what your body feels. If you have stressed maybe through a busy life, problems or illness then your adrenals get to the point that they can no longer send out adrenaline to help you cope. Your body over-reacts to every stimulation as though it is a threat, calls for adrenaline and there is none available.
I was in the supermarket with my partner wearing sunglasses to protect me from the blinding light and trying to make a decision on a loaf of bread. Easy really as it had to be gluten free and there was only one choice, so my partner left me to it to rush back and get some fruit we had forgotten.
My lack of adrenaline took over and I became over powered by my senses and I had no defence to this over stimulation. I had to sit, but where….my partner was away, there are no chairs so I just slumped to the floor and sat gasping and crying. At that moment a colleague from work came around the corner and found me collapsed. My partner had bumped into a friend and had been having a chat not realising that I could no longer be out on my own.
It was horrible and I knew then that I really needed to get this health issue sorted and that whilst your thyroid and adrenals work in harmony then life is good. I had to find the solution.
Many months later I was on tablets to help my adrenal glands and managing to visit the supermarket, still in dark glasses but now on my own. It was a huge achievement till I was overwhelmed by the choice of the one thing I had come in for
‘ toilet paper’. I stood there and started to shake, to feel weak and to want to cry, I just could not make a simple decision. Again a friend saw me and said ‘Gill here, just take the cheapest’ so decision made I managed to pay and walk home.
Now years later, I still take a small dose of adrenal support every day just to keep me on top of my life. The thyroid took a lot longer. My thyroid medication is not the standard as I worked for better treatment and I have to monitor myself daily as to how my body is working.
I don’t like the word fight as it has negative connotations such as lose. I prefer to use words like work, support, enable.
Make a difference with your word choice and stop the down trod words, the negative words. It takes effort at first but soon the positive words and all that they bring to you will flow into place.